Tracey Metzger

Daydreaming

2012-01-10T11:33:00.000-05:00

As a child I used to get in trouble in school for daydreaming. I often heard things like, "Earth to Tracey" or "Hellooooo???" in an effort to get my attention that had wandered out the window. I remember during gym class being in the outfield of a kickball game and my classmates being mad at me because I missed the ball. I was in an "outfield" of my own! Daydreamers often get labeled as "flighty" or "drifty". I was affectionately nicknamed "Spacey Tracey" because my mind was often off dreaming instead of attending to the task at hand.

My "spaciness" or absentmindedness has carried over to adulthood and is often a nuisance because it results in lost car keys among other things and sometimes lost time but I have learned to embrace it.

If you can't dream it, you can't have it!

One particular daydreaming episode involved my hubby. I was in 10th grade and the marching band was rehearsing outside my French class window. They were playing "Laughter in the rain" by Neil Sedaka (hey - it was 1981 ok?) Anyway, I had a serious crush on my now husband and remember my mind dancing right out the window following the notes of the band and envisioning him and I holding hands and laughing in the rain, getting married and having wonderful children. You can laugh all you want but 26 1/2 years later here we are!! And I keep dreaming. Dreaming of him and I surrounded by our happy children and grandchildren to come all living out the lives God intended for them. It's more than daydreaming to me - it's vision. And keeping that vision in front of me has given me perspective during the not so fun times. It reminds me of the big picture and what I am working towards.

On the other hand I am very aware that not every dream comes true. I had a dream in my younger years of gathering at my mother's house on Sundays for dinner with all the family around and lots of laughter and love. But life stole that dream. So here's what I had to do.

I dreamed another dream.

I remember one particular Mother's Day feeling a little sorry for myself but knowing that I couldn't stay in that place. It's an ugly place to be. I made a decision that since I couldn't experience those family dinners from the perspective of me going to my mom's house that I would dream a new dream. A dream where my family would gather at my house and there would be lots of laughter and love. I decided to treasure the memories of my time with my mom but to continue making new ones.

This past Christmas trying to serve 24+ people at my Christmas dinner table and the volume at crazy decibels I had to remind myself... You dreamed this! And I wouldn't trade it for anything.

What I love about living this life of faith is that God continually plants new dreams inside of us. These days I dream of ways to spread the message that I believe everyone needs to hear. The message that there is a God that loves them and sees them and is for them not against them and is just waiting to make their dreams come true.

Well this blog definitely went in a different direction than I intended it to but I am going to go with it and believe that someone needed that encouragement today.

Take some time out today to dream a little. If a dream has died - dream a new one today!

As always, I'd love to hear from you. Sometimes speaking a dream out loud is the very first step towards it becoming a reality...so what are you dreaming??

Delight yourself also in the Lord, and He will give you the desires and secret petitions of your heart.

Psalm 37:4

It’s not a coincidence

2011-12-15T11:15:00.000-05:00

Have you ever been thinking about someone and then the very next day you bump into them or someone mentions them in conversation? It’s so weird when that happens and many times we will say, “What a coincidence!” But I think there are a lot fewer coincidences than we may imagine. I could easily be accused of over-spiritualizing things but I really truly believe that those coincidences are God speaking.

Sometimes when I tell someone of how God “spoke” to me on a particular subject their response will be, “I wish he would speak to me like that.” It would be fun to think that I am special (well, I am - but so are you!!) and the truth is God speaks to every one of us. Many times it is a matter of tuning in.

Did you ever notice that when you get a new car all of the sudden you see that make and model and even color car everywhere. I never ever noticed white Grand Ams on the road until I got one.

Once you condition yourself to recognize the coincidences in your life as the voice of God you will hear Him more and more.

I'll tell you why this is on my mind. I've had a few too many "coincidences" lately to write them off. In January FTGI is rolling out a mentorship program called SHINE. We will have ShineGIRL for young girls and ShineWomen for adults. Anyway, everytime we start a new venture or program I am always praying to make sure that we are on the right road. So the other day I was standing on line at the pharmacy at Publix and there was a little pamphlet (I don’t even know what it was for) and it said right across the top in bold letters --- SHINE! It made me smile to myself. Someone else might think I was reaching, but I took it as a little nod from heaven.

Then a few days later I was on a plane flipping through a magazine and there was a full page ad for Heidi Klum’s new fragrance ---SHINE!

Last Wednesday my brother and I went to see a Broadway play while I was in New York. When we entered the theater I looked over at the merchandise and there was a shirt with big letters in glitter ---SHINE! The second song of the play was SHINE and pretty much the overall message was that “You can shine!”

Coincidence, I don’t think so.

Here’s the thing. Psalm 139 says (and I’m paraphrasing here) that He knows when we sleep and when we rise, He knows our thoughts, He knows our comings in and our goings out, we cannot get away from His prescence…no matter where we go, what we do, who we hang out with…He is right there.

And if we believe that He directs our steps then why is it hard to believe that He would plant things along our path to communicate with us? If you get the chance today read Psalm 139 and realize how completely tuned into you He is! It's like putting a warm cozy blanket of His love around you to wear as you go about your day. (I guess it would be awkward to wear a blanket all day...unless you are just hanging out on the couch all day...which sounds like fun..but you get what I'm saying...)

Look for His subtle messages! I would love to hear about “coincidences” that you have had! Post a comment!

Have a great day and stay sane during this busy holiday season...on my way out to brave the mall! Pray for me ;)

The land of the living.

2011-12-06T16:52:00.000-05:00

On Saturday my daughter, my niece and I went to pick out a Christmas tree. Just before we went into the outdoor tent I got a phone call from mom's sister. She told me that my mom was ok but she had slipped when they were moving her from her chair to her bed and had hit her head as she fell to the ground. In case you are reading this and you don't know this already, my mom suffered a traumatic brain injury 20 years ago in a car accident. She lives in a nursing home and is unable to move herself except for the use of her left arm. She is also unable to eat and although she is trying hard and is managing a few words here and there she can't speak either. To add insult to injury the gash was right in the same area as the shunt that was placed in her head right after the accident. So they had to call in a surgeon to take a look at the damage the fall may have caused. He was on his way to the hospital on a Saturday night to do emergency surgery.

Not exactly what I had planned for the evening. There was nothing I could do but wait for the updates so the girls and I went about picking out a tree and I tried my best to engage in the festivities although I was definitely preoccupied.

I was comforted to know that I had an upcoming visit to see my mom planned for a few days later and could get on an earlier flight if I needed to.

When we got home the girls put on the movie Super 8 to watch while I strung the lights on the tree and ran out for Chinese food.

As they ate and watched the movie I went through the boxes of decorations. I felt a huge lump in my throat as I came across some of the decorations my mom had given me over the years. The one for Danny and I - Our First Christmas Together, the ones for Baby's first Christmas for both of the boys, Our First Home one shaped like a house... So many lovely memories. But also some pain.

I went back to finish putting the ribbon on the tree so the girls could start decorating and the movie was wrapping up. A poignant moment of dialogue in the movie made me pause and listen. The teenage boy (the leading actor) was trying to reason with the scary but sensitive alien monster who was taking out his pain on the earthlings (I know - crazy right?) ...but listen...this is what he said:

"Bad things happen, But you can still live".

That line pierced through my heart.

A few minutes later my sister texted me and said, "Just read Psalm 27:13 and thought of you.". It was the verse that God gave to me at my lowest point after my mom's accident twenty years ago. It has become my life-song. It says,

I would have despaired unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living. (NAS)

God was reminding me once again. That promise was true. I have seen so much of the goodness of God in this land of the living in these past twenty years.

And that promise is still true today. We need to make a conscious choice to BELIEVE it. This life brings pain but it also brings joy if we allow it to.

This is a tough season for many but there is joy to be had and hope to hold on to.

My mom pulled through her surgery and is doing well and is in good spirits.

Sorry this is so long but I am on a plane with nothing to do but think and write. ( I have finished flipping through the latest edition of InStyle magazine!)

In a few minutes I'll head to the same hospital she was in 20 years ago only this time with the wisdom of past experience to know that I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living.

Whatever you may be going through this season I pray that you hold onto that hope too...

Yes, bad things happen. But you CAN still live!

Love and peace to you and yours...may your day be merry and bright xo

Tracey

Should I stay or should I go...

2011-11-29T17:41:00.006-05:00

My kids tease me and say that I have a song for every situation. I'm realizing as I continue this blogging thing that they are right. Music is probably my greatest source of inspiration so I guess that makes sense. So, this time it's "Should I Stay or Should I Go" by The Clash. Side note: that song was released in 1981- I can't believe it's 30 years old!

I have found myself in this place time and time again throughout life. Where I feel (that word right there will get you in trouble most of the time) that it's time to move on but something is just not quite clicking. It's like I know there is something out there but it's accompanied by this feeling of unrest. I have this sense that there is something more to be had or to be done...something out there that I should be pursuing but I'm not quite sure what. Other times I have known exactly where I wanted to go or at least where I believed I should be going but something was stopping me from making the move. The doors were just not opening as I had hoped. And so many, many times I have found myself asking this question, "Should I stay or should I go?"

Last night I was reading Genesis 26. The chapter opens up with Isaac getting ready to move to Egypt. The land he was living in was experiencing a famine and history tells us that at the same time Egypt was prospering with plenty of water flowing from the Nile and no signs of famine. I probably would have been anxious to move there too if I was him! Feast or famine? No brainer right? Sometimes that place you are just itching to move to looks SO much better than where you are right now. But here is what God spoke to him and I knew He was whispering it to me last night. He said, "Do not go down to Egypt; live in the land where I tell you to live. Stay in this land for a while and I will be with you and will bless you." God knew that eventually it would be time for Isaac to move on and that there was great blessing in store for him but it was not time yet.

So the question becomes what do we do in the meantime? We are not being released to move on so what do we do? I know what I do a lot of the time. I pout. I do the bare minimum where I am. I stay but I'm not happy about it. I resist putting down roots of any kind because in my mind my bags are already packed. But that's not what Isaac did. And by the way - in verse 8 it tells us that he was there for a LONG time!

Here's what Isaac did.

He planted crops.

Maybe this is where the expression "bloom where you're planted" comes from.

He planted crops and in that same year reaped a HUNDREDFOLD. God blessed him for listening and not pushing forward before it was time. The story goes on to say that he became very rich and his wealth continued to grow until he was very wealthy! Pretty good stuff.

As I read this passage last night God really spoke to me personally but this morning as I was praying I just felt that this was a word for someone else too.

Is there somewhere you'd rather be but God is telling you to stay in the land that you're in for a while? Be encouraged today that He is with you and He WILL bless you! That's one of the things I love most about Him ~ He is faithful to deliver on His promises.

Feel free to leave a comment...it would encourage me to know that I am not the only one that thinks the grass is greener on the other side at times ;)

Course Correction

2011-08-23T16:28:00.000-04:00

I always feel the same way this time of the year just before school starts up again. As summer nears the end I am painfully aware of how unraveled my life has become. Any semblance of schedule and order in my life has gone completely out the window. I sleep in because I can which sets me back time-wise, then I don't get as much work done as I should. I skip exercising because we are busy doing fun things and I eat bad things when we do fun things. My house is messier because we're on the go a lot and the list goes on. We definitely have fun in the summer! We go on vacation, hit the beach and the theme parks. But all of those good things can be distractions to every day life. And pretty much every summer I end up off course!

This can happen so easily in any area of life...home, school, work, ministry.

I know that just in the past three years since FTGI began we have experienced the need for some course correction as an organization. At times we’ve gotten distracted and started down a road that has taken us off the main path. It’s important to realize that not all distractions are bad in and of themselves. Sometimes we are taken off course without realizing it because the distraction appears to be a “good” thing. We have learned the hard way that good things can take your focus off the main thing. (And that’s not usually a good thing!)

But remember - it’s NEVER too late to correct your course. I came across this definition of course correction as related to a spacecraft and I loved it!

Course Correction

When a spacecraft gets off of its trajectory, or path through space, it must be put back on the right path. The location of the spacecraft is determined and its course vector (the speed and direction of its flight) is calculated. This is compared with the path it should be on. A new vector is computed that will put it back on course. The ship's attitude thrusters aim the ship and the main thruster pushes it along the path.

Isn’t that great? The right attitude thruster will aim your “ship” in the right direction. Don’t beat yourself up because you've gotten off course. Give yourself a little pep talk and let that attitude thrust you back in the right direction. Chuck Swindoll writes in his book Strengthening Your Grip, "Attitude is that ‘single string’ that keeps me going or cripples my progress. It alone fuels my fire or assaults my hope. When my attitudes are right, there’s no barrier too high, no valley too deep, no dream too extreme, no challenge too great for me."

Once your attitude has got you aiming in the right direction it’s time to revisit what your “main thing” is. This is certainly not a new concept and sounds too simple but it is so true. We need to work hard to “keep the main thing the main thing.” Protecting your main thruster, whatever that is, will push you along the right path and cause you to soar higher than you ever imagined!!

And for those of you have gotten so off course that you feel like you don't even know where you're going - do not despair. God has got it all mapped out. He will direct your paths. Remember that His word is a lamp to your feet and a light to your path. (Psalm 119:105) And if you stop long enough to listen God promises that:

Your own ears will hear him. Right behind you a voice will say, "This is the way you should go," whether to the right or to the left.

Isaiah 30:21 (NLT)

Gardening 101

2011-08-09T11:55:00.000-04:00

For 26 years Danny and I have had an unspoken deal. The inside of the house is my responsibility for the most part and the outside is his. So the general upkeep of the yard, care of the pool (when we had one), taking out of the garbage...all his. The great part of the deal is that he has always helped me inside with the general upkeep of the inside household stuff too. I, however, have never really helped him outside except to follow him around talking at him while he gardened or cleaned the pool. He loves that ;) He has tried to get me to help but it's never worked.

But recently something changed. I was outside on my porch and I noticed a bunch of weeds in my garden and without really thinking about it I went down and started pulling them out. I was getting so much satisfaction from seeing it all cleaned up that before I knew it I was out there for over a hour.

While I was out there Danny brought me a glass of iced tea. A few minutes later he brought me out some gardening gloves and cute little shovel to help with the tough weeds. The next thing I know he had brought the ipod outside and he was playing music for me - all my favorites. After he brought out a kneeling pad so I wouldn't hurt my knees I realized why he was being so attentive! Poor guy...he's waiting 26 years for this! He told me he wanted to encourage this behavior!!

Anyway, a strange thing happened after that day. Every time I walk up my walkway now I notice the state of my garden.   It's like a light went on. One day recently I noticed a vast difference between two of the same plants that I have on either side of my walkway. One of them was noticeably thriving while the other paled in comparison. When I looked closely at the leaves of the struggling plant I saw that there were holes all over them. I went inside to "google" the possible causes of these holes and discovered that most likely caterpillars were eating them. What I read jumped out at me.

The article stated that while this particular plant is under attack it will stop flowering.

I realized immediately that the reason the plant looked so pale in comparison to the other one is that the flowers had closed up and no new flowers had sprouted.

As soon as I read that I recognized a parallel to my own life. When I am under attack whether it be flesh and blood or the enemy of my mind and soul - I stop flowering. Creativity shuts down. I want to withdraw and hide. My confidence is ebbed away at and I begin to wilt. It doesn't usually happen overnight either. My plant did not get invaded overnight. One caterpillar crawled up and began chewing away...one self-deprecating thought enters my mind and starts to eat away at my confidence. Then another caterpillar came and joined in...I begin comparing myself to someone else that I think has it all together. Before I even had a chance to notice there was a caterpillar feast going on in my front yard... Before I know it I am being bombarded by thoughts of inadequacy and self-doubt. Something has to be done - it's called pesticide!!

As soon as I was onto the caterpillar caper I pulled out the arsenal. I sprayed the plant and within minutes the caterpillars were curling up and dropping off! What amazed me was that within just a few days I noticed a huge difference in the appearance of the plant and I was thrilled to see little flowers sprouting all over it again.  All it took was me realizing that the attack was underway and then pulling out what I needed to put an end to it.

You may be under attack by flesh and blood in which case I don't recommend dousing them with pesticide (although that may sound like a good idea to you right now.) Or your attack may be in your mind and spirit but either way you must remember this - our battle is not against flesh and blood. Your adversary (the stinkin' devil) works very hard to stop you from flowering. It's his full time job. You and only you must be diligent about tending the garden of your mind and heart. And by the way as soon as I got rid of the caterpillars a few weeks later I noticed these little teensy tiny bugs on the leaves - all over the same plant! But I am ON IT. I am more determined than ever to keep this pretty plant flowering!

2 Corinthians 2: 3-5
It is true that we live in the world, but we do not fight from worldly motives. The weapons we use in our fight are not the world's weapons but God's powerful weapons, which we use to destroy strongholds. We destroy false arguments; we pull down every proud obstacle that is raised against the knowledge of God; we take every thought captive and make it obey Christ.

That's your pesticide. I want to encourage you to be an attentive gardener of your mind. Be on alert for those destructive thoughts that creep in and take them captive. Pull out the arsenal when you need to and blast them!!

I want to see you flourishing ~ hearty and healthy ~ bursting with flowers!!!

Don't answer that!

2011-07-15T12:57:00.010-04:00

My cell phone rings a million times a day. Even though I can’t always answer it I have to know who it is and I feel compelled to answer it. That drives my husband nuts. If he is involved with something and his phone rings he just lets it ring. And that drives me nuts. I’ll ask him, “Don’t you think you should answer that? Don’t you think you should check and see who it is?” But he doesn’t. It drives me nuts on one hand but I envy him on the other hand. I have become somewhat of a slave to my cell phone. We’ll be sitting at the dinner table and my phone will ring and he’ll see me squirming in my chair because I just need to know who it is and he’ll just look at me and say, “Let it ring”

A few months ago I had a really bizarre dream. That is not abnormal for me. I have a lot of dreams. Crazy dreams. Sometimes it’s just because I ate Mexican food the night before but sometimes...occasionally I will wake up from a crazy dream and it will stay with me through the day. And sometimes for days after. When that happens I start to analyze it and wonder if there is some message in it for me. I believe that God speaks to us in all kinds of ways and for me on many occasions it’s through my dreams.

Ok so you have to stay with me here because it gets a little confusing. So a few months ago I was dreaming that I was sleeping in my bed. Have you got that? In my dream I was asleep in my bed. All of the sudden I was woken up by my cell phone ringing. Bleary eyed, I reached for my phone and flipped it open to see who was calling. What I saw next startled me. Where the name or number of the person calling me would normally be was the word Angry. Angry was calling me?! I was so puzzled in my dream and I said out loud, “Why is Angry calling me?” Then I woke up.

I told Danny and we laughed about it. But it wouldn’t go away. All day I had this nagging feeling. That afternoon Danny was taking me to the beach for an overnight stay to celebrate my birthday. We went on the motorcycle. I always feel so free on the back of his bike with the wind in our faces and the sun on our shoulders but this time I was disturbed. Why was angry calling me? That’s when I started to realize that this was more than just a silly dream.

I started to pray as we drove. I asked God to show me if I was angry. I didn’t think I was angry. If you asked me the day before if I was angry about anything I would have said no. But when I started to really peel back what had been going on inside of me for the past few months I had a revelation. I realized that some hurts that I had recently endured and some disappointments that had recently come my way and some circumstances that I had no control over that I wanted to make better but couldn’t, were beginning to eat at me and were making me – yep – ANGRY. Not throw things across the room angry (not that I’ve ever done that ;) ) or yell and stomp my feet angry. Just a simmering anger that things were not the way I wanted them to be. And since I believe that God is the one that can make all things better and they weren’t better I realized that if I was angry then I was angry at Him. Why had He allowed these things to happen. I did not see how any good could come from them. But I know better than that. That’s when I realized that I had some letting go to do. Walking down the beach that afternoon I let go. Let go of the disappointment, let go of the hurt...let go of the anger and gave way to trust. Trust that God had a plan in all of it.

I called a friend who is further along in the ministry journey than I am and she had some words of wisdom for me. She said, “Tracey I believe that God is showing you a tendency that you have. He is showing you that when people disappoint or hurt you or things don’t turn out the way you want them to, even after you think you are on the other side of it, the residual effect for you is that you tend to get angry. So here’s what you need to do. Now that you know, when you see on that caller id. that Angry is calling you, you need to let it go straight to voicemail. Let the message say, “I’m sorry Tracey is not available to take that call right now...or ever.”

Angry may not be calling you but maybe something else is. Maybe Insecurity calls you every morning. Maybe Fear or Doubt or Guilt calls you on a regular basis. We have to realize that we have a choice whether or not to take that call. So from now on just...”Let it ring!”

Philippians 4:8

For the rest, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is worthy of reverence and is honorable and seemly, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely and lovable, whatever is kind and winsome and gracious, if there is any virtue and excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think on and weigh and take account of these things [fix your minds on them].

Amplified Bible (AMP)

Suddenly!!

2011-06-27T11:07:00.017-04:00

We are here at our vacation spot in a little town in Maine called Damariscotta. The one thing you can depend on here is that you cannot depend on the weather. We left Florida at six o'clock in the morning and it was already oppressively hot. We were sweating at 4:30am just from spending 10 minutes outside loading our bags in the car. We arrived in Portland about 11:00 am and were immediately taken by the lack of humidity as we stepped onto the jetbridge. After collecting our luggage we all gloried in the fresh Maine air as we left the terminal. It was like that for the rest of the first day but even as we sat watching the lake we could see the waves blowing in from the east indicating that rain was on it's way. Rain in Maine is very different than rain in Florida. The thunderstorms that roll out as quickly as they roll in to take the edge off of the tropical heat of the day are not common in this northern part of the country. When rain comes it comes to stay, sometimes for days on end.

Such was the case with the rain that blew in that first evening in the cottage. With it came the damp chill in the air that mocked me me as I unpacked. It's hard to conjure up the memory of this weather when you are packing in 90 degrees. So everything in my suitcases was light and sleeveless for the most part. The cottage is not winterized so it is difficult to get it warm. Thankfully there are lots of blankets and tea. The rain continued on and off for three days straight but when it wasn't actually raining it was too cold and wet to be outdoors. For someone that doesn't get to enjoy sunshine for 90 percent of the year this could be disheartening but we made the most of it playing games, reading and watching old movies that we've seen a thousand times. It also helped to know that we still had two full weeks ahead of us.

But last night as we drove home from my sister's cottage after a lively game of taboo that made us laugh until we cried we could see the stars out and Danny encouraged all of us that the sun would be out in the morning. We went to bed hopeful.

At 6:30am this morning I was awakened by a stream of sunlight finding it's way through the gap in the closed curtains. The rain was gone. The day was bright. I got out of bed (after sleeping for a few more hours) and did what I had been waiting to do since I got here. I made a cup of tea and sat out on the dock taking in the scenery. The lake looked like a completely different place from the past few days. It was transformed into the beautiful lush peaceful haven I know it to be. Gone was the dark overcast, moody, dreary atmosphere of the past seventy two hours; here was a day of full of sunshine and promise.

I was reminded of something I heard a long time ago that stuck with me.

"Sometimes God takes a long time to move suddenly!"

So true! I have been been in those seasons of my life many times where I felt like I was "frozen in a winter of discontent" (lyrics of a song). Where I knew there was a promise waiting to be fulfilled but it was just taking SO long. So long that I began to doubt if I would ever see the sun shine again. I knew that God promised that if I waited on him he would renew my strength. (Isaiah 40:31) But I felt so weak. I knew that the plans He had for me were to prosper me and not to harm me, to give me a future and a hope. (Jer. 29.11) But I couldn't see how things could possibly work out from where I was standing. I remember feeling like I should be doing something. When all He wanted me to do was wait. Wait and seek Him. That even though I could not see it He was working behind the scenes on my behalf waiting for the right moment to move.

One of those times in particular was when Danny and I were hoping and praying and believing for the opportunity for Danny to become a Chick-fil-A Operator. We had been in the process for several years already waiting for an opportunity in our area to come open. We had interviewed and were waiting for word. I'll never forget the day they called and said that all the changes in the area had been made and they would not be offering him a store at that point. They did not know when another opportunity in the area would become available. Pretty much - don't call us we'll call you. It was not what we had expected to hear. We had even moved, downsizing, during the interviewing process in order to position ourselves better financially. And now all we could do was wait. We were devastated. I remember when Danny told me I was leaning up against the bedroom wall and I just sort of slid down and sat on the floor for a while (and cried.) I was so sure that we were moving in the right direction. Could it have been that we had "heard" God wrong. We could still hope and wait but there was no guarantee that the call would ever come. I got a card from a sweet friend of mine right afterward that said, "I know what they told you but I still believe and I'm standing with you." Hope. That's all we could do is wait, hope and believe. And then as quickly as the sun came out this morning, a LONG year later, they called. Completely out of the blue. Chick-fil-A called - some changes were taking place....were we still interested?

It took a long time but then He moved - suddenly!

If you are in that season today where it is dark and overcast and you can't see how things could possibly change be encouraged today that He is for you and not against you. That even as you wait He is renewing your strength. Whether you feel it or not. Cuddle up and remind yourself of His promises. Rest as much as you can. Be still and know that He is God and He's got you covered. Before you know it and probably when you least expect it the sun will come out.

Psalm 27:14
Wait and hope for and expect the Lord; be brave and of good courage and let your heart be stout and enduring. Yes, wait for and hope for and expect the Lord.
Amp.

DELAYED

2011-05-20T09:01:00.005-04:00

Have you ever arrived at an airport all ready to go on your greatly anticipated trip just to see the word DELAYED after your flight number on the departure board? I hate when that happens!

Having worked for several airlines I have had to be the bearer of bad news to many a passenger over the years. There they are - all geared up to check in and head for their gate when I have to break the news that their flight isn't going to depart on time. That information can turn the nicest passenger into a monster! People do not like their plans to be delayed or changed. One customer-turned-monster threw her hot coffee and bagel across the counter at me. (that little tirade got her arrested by the way!) Then there are the few passengers that "get it". They seem to grasp the fact that the safety and security of the passengers is the priority and it is more important that they actually arrive at their destination in one piece than take off on time with issues that may escalate to major problems.

There are times that we have our timetable all mapped out and we are just ready to go and God writes DELAYED on our flight board. I have been there and I have played the part of the irritated passenger many times in my life. Stomping my feet and asking "WHY?" But I have learned to look for what God is doing during the delay because that is most likely a very very important part of the journey and where most of our growth happens.

I remember clearly the evening that Danny told me that he thought we needed to hold off on submitting our application for adoption to Great Wall China Adoption agency. My heart sunk. we had already been talking about it for a year and I had been dreaming about it for a while before that. I was SO ready. DELAYED. Why? In retrospect it's easy to see. Danielle my beautiful daughter was not even born yet. We had to wait because the daughter that God had for us was not ready. But in the meantime I learned and I grew. I learned about trusting my husband. I learned more about the plight of the orphans in China. That knowledge developed into a passion to help other families through the adoption process. Because of how long it took to go through the process of adoption and all the delays I began holding workshops to inform people about the process and helped set the wheels in motion for hundreds of families to adopt. If our adoption had gone through quickly I would have happily had my baby but wouldn't have sought out the opportunity to help others along the way. DELAYED yes, but well worth it.

I heard someone recount the story of Lazarus recently and it has stuck with me ever since. The story of Lazarus paints a beautiful picture of Jesus delaying an answer to a prayer in order to work in the lives of others along the way. Lazarus' healing was DELAYED but it was intentional in order to build faith in those surrounding the situation. It wasn't just about Lazarus. It was about Lazarus plus everyone that witnessed the miracle but it was ultimately about you and me.

According to Martha and Mary, Jesus showed up late. If they had had their way their brother would have never died, because Jesus would have showed up and healed him immediately. However, the miracle that Jesus performed and the timing he chose was deliberate and set in motion the chain of events that led to his death on the cross. The story in John 11 tells us that immediately after Jesus raised Lazarus from the dead the Pharisees began plotting his death. It was that particular miracle that sent them over the edge and the timing of it was woven into our story of redemption. God knows that immediate answers are not always best. Lazarus had to die before he received his answer, but the result was an exponentially bigger display of God's power.

You may be experiencing a delay that you don't understand now but God's word promises us that if we believe we will see the glory of God. (John 11:40)

Your miracle may be right around the corner! Don't stop believing.

Beyond AWAKEN...

2011-04-13T14:33:00.003-04:00

This Monday night is the GNO (Girls Night Out - for those of you who may not be up on the lingo :) )

How did that happen?

It feels like AWAKEN 2011 just ended. But so much has happened since then. We are still hearing stories of people that were truly awakened during that wonderful weekend that we spent together. Awakened to their idenity as a child of God. Awakened to FREEDOM! Awakened to dreams that had been asleep for a long time...too long! Awakened to the need to connect with other women of like dreams and passions. These are the stories that keep us going.

The other reality that I can't ignore is that there are also those of us that left the conference fired up and ready to take on the world only to have the winds of life blow intensely threatening to put out the flame that was lit. Some didn't even make it through the conference before something was threatening to dampen their light. One weekend is just not enough to fit everything in which is why I am so grateful for our Girls Nights Out. We can build on what we began. We can continue the conversation.

At AWAKEN I talked about how we need to be like those trick candles that you put on a birthday cake that just refuse to go out. Just like those candles have a substance called magnesium built inside them to cause them to continually reignite we must have faith built inside of us to help us to keep shining! Faith is our substance. Faith is the substance of things hoped for the evidence of things not seen - Hebrews 11:1. So even when we don't see with our natural eye what can be - faith keeps us moving in the right direction.

My heart is full with a message to encourage those that are struggling to keep their flame blazing as well as those that are blazing a new trail. Even though we would all love to believe that we can SHINE without so much as flickering or dimming just a little at times we all know that is not the world we live in.

So the question that we touched on at AWAKEN is still out there...how do we keep shining when there is so much out there that threatens to extinguish our flame? On Monday night we are going to talk about FANNING THE FLAME!

Don't miss the opportunity to be encouraged. We need each other!

Lots of Love,
Tracey

Anticipation

2011-02-04T14:29:00.009-05:00

WARNING: You probably won't appreciate this unless you're over 40 :)

Anticipation....Antici-pay-ya-tion...is keeping me wa-a-a-a-aiting!

Ah...Carly Simon - love her. One of my vocal heroes growing up in the 70's. I just finished up working on my notes for next Friday night when I will be speaking to a bunch of amazing women and girls that gather each year for the AWAKEN conference. I have such a huge amount of anticipation for the weekend and I don't quite know what to do with it.

It's a nervous excitement. So many pieces that need to come together. So many details to remember. So much hope put into two days. Hope that women come expecting and leave fulfilled. Hope that they will leave shining a little brighter than they came. It's impossible to know exactly what God is going to do in the life of each precious person that comes but it is so comforting to know that all His pieces will be there. All His details will be covered so the rest is just gravy. We can rest knowing that when two or three are gathered in His name He is there in the midst of them. We can throw all the bling and chocolate at it that we want to but we cannot match what God does in the midst of his people.

I am imagining worship that will take the roof off...laughter that will flow. Maybe a few tears as God touches our hearts like only He can. I am hoping for healing. I am praying for hurts and wounds from the past to be shaken off. And for much needed refreshment to be administered to weary bones!

Thinking of the song "Anticipation" made me crave a little Carly Simon so I threw on her cd as I was working. It's so crazy how songs can hit you a certain way at particular times. I came to the song "Haven't got time for the pain" and the words struck me. The lyrics are great when I thought about it as a little conversation between me and God.

I haven't got time for the pain...
I haven't got room for the pain...
I haven't the need for the pain...
not since I've known you
You showed me how
How to leave myself behind
How to turn down all the noise in my mind (and that's a lot of noise)
then later...
You showed me how
How to fill my heart with love
How to open up and drink in all that white light pouring down from the heavens!!

God speaks to me in the weirdest ways sometimes! I just had such a picture of Him pouring down His white light from heaven next weekend...I can't wait!

In the beginning of the song it talks about how sometimes suffering is the only way we can feel that we are alive. That it's just how much it costs to survive in this world. (are you singing along?) Here's the thing. There is pain. Of course there is. We do suffer and there are times that we have to allow ourselves to "be" with the pain. I've been there. But there is also a time for letting go of the pain. There is so much to be done. So many lives that need to be touched and if we are going to be His light we don't have time for the pain.

Yes, in this lifetime there is pain...but there is also joy to be had...unspeakable joy!!

I am praying today that God will flood the Safety Harbor Resort and Spa with His white light from above and fill it with His joy.

Tomorrow morning our team will go down there to pray for every woman and girl that will be attending. It is one of my favorite parts of preparing for AWAKEN 2011...a little foretaste of what is in store for all of us!

Can't wait!! But we have to...only 1 more week!

Hope to see you there!
Love,
Tracey

Wisdom from Gandalf

2010-12-28T18:51:00.002-05:00

The week after Christmas is always fun with all the family still in town from the holiday! Last night we had a family movie night at our house. The scene was just as I like it. My overstuffed comfy brown couch packed full of cousins of all ages, Danny and I snuggled with pillows and blankets on the floor and several others perched on chairs around the living room. (It would have been a little better if Danny and I were on the comfy couch and the kids were on the floor!) The kids selected an epic film to watch as we ate leftover goodies from Christmas. The movie pick was The Lord of the Rings -Fellowship of the Ring.

Anyway, while we were watching it I had a moment. It was an exchange between Frodo and Gandalf that really made me stop and think. Frodo was overwhelmed with the awesome responsibility and burden that came with the One Ring that he inherited from his uncle. The task given to him was to return the One Ring to the place from whence it came and destroy it by casting it into the fires of Mount Doom. I'm sure I am oversimplifying here but the gist is that if he failed in his mission evil would overtake the world. That was a pretty heavy burden for such a little hobbit.

And so Frodo was having a very understandable little pity party for himself. This is how the conversation went:

"Frodo: I wish the ring had never come to me. I wish none of this had happened. Gandalf: So do all who live to see such times, but that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us."

Gandalf's wise answer has echoed in my mind ever since I heard it. Haven't we all felt like that at one time or another when something catastrophic has occurred? "I wish none of this had happened!" Or maybe you have a calling on your life that you know in your heart of hearts you must fulfill but it comes at a high cost. It would be a whole lot easier to just walk away. Something inside you may wish you had never been asked to carry that burden. But that is not for us to decide. Things beyond our control happen. God calls us to bear burdens that we would not necessarily choose to carry. But that is not for us to decide.

What we have to decide is what we will do with the time given us. God knows what you can handle. He made you. He knows that when He brings you through that adversity or when He leads you in your calling that it will have a profound and invaluable effect on you and those you come in contact with.

So what will you do with the time that you've been given? Will you dig deep and find the strength that you already possess and carry out that which you have been called to do?

I love how God works. I have been praying a lot about my talk for AWAKEN 2011 Arise and Shine. This subject goes right along with what I have been meditating on. I am going to be talking about Joseph and all the adversity that he endured but I promise you it will be encouraging!

I hope that you will join us in February (if you are a woman/young lady). We are looking forward to a great time together!!

Click here to enjoy the movie clip...

Love,
Tracey

A cup of HOPE

2010-11-18T12:37:00.008-05:00

A funny thing happened to me the other day. Maybe it was just a coincidence...but then again...

One morning a few weeks ago I was spending way too much time on Facebook while sipping my morning tea and I came across a link posted by a friend. The link was to a website promoting a new book called Your Secret Name by Kary Oberbrunner.

The premise of the book is that as we journey through life we pick up names based on what others speak over us, or experiences that we have had, or choices that we have made. Some examples of those names could be ABANDONED or FEARFUL or REJECTED or FAILURE...you get the idea. In his book, Kary relays the fact that God has given each one of us a new name based on the verse in Revelation 2:17 that says "He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches. To him who overcomes, I will give some of the hidden manna. I will also give him a white stone with a new name written on it, known only to him who receives it." On the website there is a box you can click on that says, "TAKE THE TEST" (to find out what your secret name might be).

Now, I have to admit I was a little skeptical at first and was thinking maybe it was a little gimmicky but I am a sucker for those kinds of tests so I proceeded. As I looked through the list of potential names that I may have acquired the one that jumped out at me was DEPRESSED. I could have picked a few but I have battled that several times in my life so I really related to that one. I clicked on it and the next page said:

God's secret name for you could be:

HOPE

When I read the name HOPE it resonated with me so deeply that I took a long, deep breath and exhaled slowly as if I was actually breathing it in and allowing it to move through me. I thought...yeah...my secret name is definitely HOPE. I've known it for some time now. Hope is what has gotten me through many seasons and it's become my story. It's what drives me to want to reach out to others and share it. If you've ever felt hopeless then you know what I mean. Once you grasp it you want to give it away because there is an unending supply - plenty to go around.

So that was pretty cool but it gets better...

After I shut off my computer, I went about my day and ended up at the International Mall (don't know how that happened!) Mid-way through my shopping excursion I decided to stop at Starbucks for my afternoon pick-me-up. I ordered my Grande Cafe Misto with whipped cream. My barista grabbed a cup and her pen and started to ask my name as they usually do. Here's how it went...

Looking down at the cup she started to say "What's your name" but then she looked up and only got out "What's your..." before she stopped mid-sentence, cocked her head to the side and said decidedly, "I'm going to call you HOPE". Then she wrote it as my name on my cup!!

I was absolutely speechless. I must have gone white as a ghost because I was so shocked. I just stood there staring at her like "How did you know my secret name???????????????" She quickly realized that she had completely freaked me out so she started pointing at my shirt and said, "you know...HOPE" with this really nervous pleading smile. Poor girl!

Apparently in my rush to get dressed that morning I had thrown on my shirt that says HOPE and then (because I have serious short term memory issues) had totally forgotten that I had it on. Here I was thinking she was an angel from heaven disguised as a Starbucks barista confirming my secret name to me in person and she was just naming me from my shirt!

Anyway, I go to Starbucks a lot. I wear shirts that say things on them quite often. I have never had anyone write anything on my cup besides the name I have given them. Sooooo even though she was just a regular earthly barista I thought it was a pretty awesome coincidence!! I wish I could have told her the story but there was an enormous line behind me. I just smiled and told her that she had just made my day. That seemed to make hers :)

I had the pleasure of speaking with Kary (the author) on the phone about his ministry. He is passionate about the same things that we are at For the Girls International - helping people discover who God created them to be and helping them live out their purpose in freedom and grace!

So what is your secret name? Check out the website when you have a minute. What you find out might surprise you or maybe confirm what you've known all along. Let me know what you think.

God cares about the littlest things!

2010-03-30T18:03:00.003-04:00

Yesterday was one of those days when I was just completely awestruck with how much God loves me and cares about the smallest desires of my heart. This may seem like such a silly little thing to most people but it was a big deal for me.

Last Wednesday I was on my morning run. (yes I’m still running!) I had been listening to Amy Grant the day before on my ipod and for some reason she was on my mind while I was running. I was thinking about how much I admired her. I definitely like her pop songs like Baby Baby but she also has some pretty deep songs too. She is so very real and shares some pretty raw emotion in some of her music. I have always appreciated her lyrics and feel like she sees the world like I do, asks a lot of the same questions I do and comes to the same conclusions I do. I’ve just always felt that there was a connection there. She is about 5 years older than me and I started listening to her when she started making music which was about 30 years ago so we’ve sort of grown up together. My heart broke for her when her first marriage ended and she endured some harsh criticism from some of those in the “Christian” community. I respected the way she handled that whole ordeal and thought she was an incredible example of “grace under fire” (the firing line, that is.) I rejoiced for her when she remarried and the evidence of God’s grace and healing power was written on her face and in her songs.

Anyway, as I was running I was thinking about all this and I thought to myself, “I would really love to meet her.” And then I thought, “Why not?... I could make that one of the things on my list of things I want to do in life. Make it a goal….meet Amy Grant.” So that was it. I didn’t even say it to God, I just thought it.

That very afternoon I was going through my emails and my sister had forwarded to me a newsletter from the local radio station The JOYFM. Her note to me said, “Thought I'd pass this along to you. It's an opportunity to see Amy Grant perform live and meet her after the show, too.” The email went on to say that Amy would be at a bookstore in Brandon on Monday!!! You can imagine my shock and surprise. Could it be that God cares enough about the littlest desire of my heart that He would orchestrate all of these events to fulfill a passing wish? Yes. He does.

So then I started thinking, well too bad I didn’t wish for world peace or something of more significance to the world but that was not the point of this wish-Granting exercise(pardon the pun – it was too easy.) I believe God wanted me to know in no uncertain terms on that day that He hears my every thought and that He is with me. I realize that I will have wishes and desires that may never be filled but I am so very grateful for the big and small ways that He shows me that He loves me.

On Monday I took the day off from work and went to Brandon to check something off my list.

Meet Amy Grant – check

Everything rides on HOPE!

2009-12-10T14:50:00.000-05:00

Hope is my favorite subject because it is what gives us life and sustains our joy. It is what keeps me going!

In 1991 when I was 26 years old a young mother of two little boys my mother was in a car accident that left her severely brain injured. So many expectations and hopes for the future died the day of that accident. I knew my mom would never play the role that I had expected her to play in my life or the lives of my children again. In the months following her accident while we waited for my mother to emerge from a coma, I found myself slipping deeper and deeper into a dark place. I remember watching my beautiful little boys playing at the park and thinking to myself, "Will I ever be able to enjoy anything again?"

One day in the midst of my disappointment and anger I pleaded with God to give me something to hold onto. I opened my Bible and went to Psalms because I knew that to be an encouraging book. Here is what the author had written:

I would have despaired had I not known that I would see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. (Psalm 27:13)

The whole idea of eternal perspective began to become clear to me and I have been clinging to it ever since. We will one day see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. My mom will be healed in the land of the living. I will be reunited with my loved ones in the land of the living. This lifetime is a dying flame but the land of the living is eternal!

2 Corinthians 5:17 says
For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen but what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

That is where my hope lies. But not only has He given us hope for the eternal future but He has given us hope for today. We can have joy in the journey.... His mercies are new every morning! The answer to my question "Will I ever be able to enjoy anything again?" was and is a resounding "YES!"

Hope was not given to us just for our own satisfaction. It was given to us to give away. And what happens when you give hope to someone else is amazing! You will find that your own healing comes when you share the hope that you have.

The principle is clearly stated in Isaiah 58:6-9

Share your food with the hungry and provide the poor wanderer with shelter - when you see the naked clothe him, and do not turn away from your own flesh and blood.
Then your light will break forth like the dawn, and your healing will quickly appear; then your righteousness will go before you, and the glory of the Lord will be your rear guard.

The holiday season can be a difficult time for many people. Maybe it is a painful reminder of unmet expectations. There are so many people in need of hope. Those of us that have hope must reach out to those struggling to find it. We can't solve all of the world's problems but we can make a difference in the lives of those around us one person at a time.

I wish I could say that the period of my mom's accident was the only time I have struggled with dark days but unfortunately that is not the case. But hope is what has brought me through every season of my life and it is the basis of For the Girls International.

My pastor asked me to share my story last week with our church and here is the video of our conversation.

Click here to watch video.

Wishing you all the beauty of this Christmas season as we celebrate the birth of Jesus the reason for this hope we have!

Lots of Love,
Tracey

Seasons Of Change Part II - Overcoming Fear

2009-11-10T13:53:00.002-05:00

Maybe that is not the right title for this post. Maybe it should be Facing Fear Head On because I don’t know if I’ve ever actually overcome fear.

I’d like to talk about what happens when we feel that God is leading us in a new direction but we are afraid to take the next step. Or maybe we are afraid to even believe that He really wants to use us in that way. This is a powerful tool that the devil will use to stop our forward progress.

Many times as I begin a new adventure with God, I immediately begin to have thoughts that I am not qualified to do whatever it is God is calling me to do. I think to myself…there must be a braver candidate out there that would do a much better job. If we read the stories of men and women that God used in huge ways to accomplish great things for Him we will notice that courage is not something that necessarily came naturally to them either.

Think about Joshua for example; God gave him a big job to do. He was to lead millions of people into the Promised Land. Take a minute to read Joshua chapter 1 when you have a chance. It is the moment when God gives Joshua his marching orders. In verses 6-9 God tells Joshua THREE times to be strong and courageous. He goes even further and tells him, “…do not be terrified; do not be discouraged….” I imagine Joshua was pretty overwhelmed with the thought of trying to step into Moses’ shoes and tackle this major undertaking! In verse 9 God promises him, “…the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” I LOVE that!!!

2 Chronicles 20 tells the story of King Jehosophat as he was wrestling with a task God had given him. He admits in verse 12 that he doesn’t know what to do, but he tells God that his eyes are on Him. God’s response in verse 15 is the same as it was to Joshua: “…Do not be afraid or discouraged because of this vast army, for the battle is not yours, but God’s….” I LOVE that too!!!

Joyce Meyer sent out a newsletter recently and something that she wrote just screamed off the page to me and I couldn’t say it better myself so here it is:

“When we look at the courageous people in our lives, we think they’re so strong, and we tell ourselves we could never be like them. But the truth is courageous people fear. They just go for it ANYWAY!

"After facing these fears over and over in my life, I’ve learned that sometimes in order to find the courage to receive a new thing from God, I just have to do it afraid!”

If you are entering a new season of your life and what lies ahead looks challenging I want to encourage you not to wait around until you feel ready but to step out and DO IT AFRAID!

Seasons of Change - Part 1

2009-11-02T10:18:00.008-05:00

I enjoyed our Autumn Girls Night Out so much and I hope everyone that came did too. After I spoke I still felt that there were some things that I wanted to share but didn't get to cover. I've divided them into 3 parts and will share them over the next few weeks here on my blog.

Last Monday night I talked a little bit about embracing change. That always means letting go of the old. Whether "the old" was a good season or a not-so-good season we still need to let it go in order to set the stage for "the new".

I shared a little bit about one of those changing seasons in my life. It was the year that my oldest son graduated high school and I was beginning to feel the first effects of my season of raising children transitioning into the season of letting them go. At the same time my grandparents' health was failing and I was beginning to realize that I didn't have very much longer with them here on earth. Those things combined with some health issues made for a pretty emotionally miserable me.

On one particular afternoon, during the week that we were packing my son's things up to move him away to college, I was driving home from work and heard the Stevie Nicks song "Landslide". It goes like this...

Well I've been afraid of changing, 'cos I built my life around you
But time makes you bolder children get older
I'm getting older too

So, you can imagine the scene...I could hardly see the road for the tears pouring out of my eyes and down my cheeks. I was bawling my eyes out. It wasn't bad enough my son was leaving but to add insult to injury...I'M GETTING OLDER TOO!!!

I know it's just a song but it touched a nerve. Up until that point, to some degree, I had "built my life around" being a mom. A mom with all of her kids at home with her in the same house, sleeping under the same roof every night. Now that was changing.

Later in the song it asks the question:

Can I sail through the changing ocean tides
Can I handle the seasons of my life?

Those questions cut right to the core of what I was feeling. Have you ever felt that way? Have you ever been in a season where you find yourself asking..."can I handle this?"

Let me help you out with that one. The answer is an unequivocal YES! You can handle this and any season when you know who is writing your story and who is holding the plan for your life in His hands.

This was God's promise to the Israelites when they were living in exile, removed from their comfort zone, out in no-man's land without a clear picture of what the future would bring:

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

I believe the promises recorded in the Bible are there for us to grab onto to carry us through the seasons of our lives.

It was during that stormy season of my life that God began to give me ideas and visions of what has evolved into For the Girls International. It's amazing how even in the darkest of times God will whisper to you plans that He has for your future.

I encourage you to take the time to press your ear in close to Him to hear those whispers. Even if it seems like a crazy idea or something so far off or out of the box...write it down. Tuck it away so that when He asks you to begin to step out you are ready.

Part of embracing change is allowing yourself to "feel" it. There's a difference between allowing yourself to feel it and dwelling on it to the point that is pulls you down to a place of hopelessness. It's unrealistic to think we can "sail through the changing ocean tides" without getting doused with a little saltwater so don't beat yourself up if you find yourself shedding a salty tear or two. On the other hand, we don't need to drown in our sorrows either.

When you find yourself in that place of emotional "landslide" start talking to yourself. Grab hold of the promises that God has clearly given you and embrace your changing season as an essential element of your destiny.

Check back in the coming weeks for Parts 2 and 3!

Seasons of Change

2009-10-16T12:15:00.008-04:00

There's an old proverb that says, "Change is the only constant."

I've been thinking about this subject a lot over the past month as I have been preparing a message about the "Seasons of Change" for FTGI's Girls Night Out in October.

Of course it is Fall and so the topic seemed appropriate, but more than just picking a topic that would go with the decorations I always pray that I will share something that will touch the hearts of the women I speak to right where they are. Lately I have had so many conversations with people that are in a season of change in their lives. I can relate.

Although change can be uncomfortable and a bit difficult to navigate at times it is what brings out the colors in our lives. As God moves us into new seasons we discover colors that we didn't even know were there!

When I think of the "Fall" season of life I think of the stripping off of the old to make room for the new. Even though the letting go part can be so hard it is often necessary for growth and that is exciting!! If we don't embrace change we could miss out on a beautiful arrangement of color to add to the landscape of our lives.

I hope to see all of you at our Autumn Girls Night Out. I'll be speaking in more depth about navigating the seasons of change. Whether you come or not I hope this verse speaks life into your heart about your future...with God writing your story this is what you have to look forward to:

Jeremiah 29:11

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Lots of Love,

Tracey

P.S.

I love the fact that the God we serve is unchanging. What a comfort to know that through every season of our life He is the same yesterday, today and forever! (Hebrews 13:8)

Good News

2009-09-17T17:59:00.009-04:00

As a post script to my last blog I'd like to report that the peace that God gave me regarding the news of the suspicious lump, lasted all week long. So much so that I forgot at times that it was looming in the back of my mind - a matter to be dealt with. I did my best throughout the week to keep my mind stayed on Him but I also had a LOT of prayers for which I am very grateful.

Today was the day. They decided to aspirate the cyst. It was a complex cyst which meant that it had shading on the ultrasound that indicated that it may not be completely fluid. That shading is what they needed to investigate. They explained how they would do that. They would take a needle and guided by ultrasound they would puncture the cyst. Then they would suction it. If it all drained out, the cyst would collapse and it would be all good. If not, they would switch the needle to a bigger one, get a sample of what was left and send it for a biopsy. I liked the first scenario best. I pick door #1 please.

As I laid there being prepped, here's how my thought process went...

Gosh, I can't believe how very calm I am...

I can't believe how much peace I have laying here waiting for them to stick me with a large needle...

Why do I have so much peace??? (Here's where the downward spiral began...)

I wonder if God is preparing me for something???

I wonder if He's giving me this peace in advance to cushion the bad news I may get???

How quickly I digressed! I let the if's come creeping in.

I can just imagine God looking down and saying..."What is it with this girl? She prays for peace, I give it to her and then she questions why she has so much peace!"

I caught myself and turned my attention to the doctor who was saying, "OK, here we go" and I watched the monitor as the fluid completely drained out and the cyst collapsed. YAY!!

The three lovely ladies in the room were all so genuinely happy for me.

I mentioned to one of the ladies that my heart ached a little to think of the women that have gone before me and those who will come after me whose news would not be as good. She assured me that there is so much that can be done now that even bad news still comes with a lot of hope. I know I will have even more compassion now for the causes bearing the pink ribbons.

Thanks to my family and friends for all the prayers and thank you Lord for the peace that surpasses all understanding.

Love,

Tracey

Philippians 4:6-7

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything , by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your mind in Christ Jesus.

To fear or not to fear?

2009-09-09T09:19:00.003-04:00

When I was younger I battled with fear. I have worked hard to overcome it because nothing good comes of it. For the most part I feel like I have a handle on it now, but every so often it tries to rears its ugly head.

Last week I went to see my doctor for a “yearly” exam (that I haven’t had in 7 years). I know, I know, I’m not proud of that I’m just letting you know - it’s been a while. (If you are a guy and you’re reading this you may want to click out now and go read the paper or something.)

During the routine visit the doctor performed a breast exam. She stopped mid-exam and with a concerned look on her face ask me, “Have you ever felt this before?” She was referring to a small lump that she was fingering. I hadn’t. I don’t know how I missed it but I did.

She immediately set-me up for a mammogram and an ultrasound to investigate. Right about then is when my fearful nature would have kicked into overdrive. The “what if____” questions were beginning to circle, taunting me to fill in the blanks. I didn’t want the “what if’s” to prevail so I reached for a promise. This verse was the first one that popped into my head:

You will keep her in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on You.
(I changed the pronouns to suit myself :))

That’s the part of the verse that I remembered. So that’s what I did. I started to think about the fact that no one loves me more than God does and He’s the one in control of everything in my life.

I went about my day in peace. Peace throughout the mammogram. Peace throughout the ultrasound. I’m telling you, I had an overwhelming sense of PEACE. His word is true, His promises are for TODAY.

When I got home I looked it up the verse and found it in Isaiah. But there was more to it than just the part I had remembered. Here it is in its entirety.

Isaiah 26:3 (New King James Version)
You will keep her in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on You, because she trusts in You.

In that simple verse there is a promise, a condition and a reason.

The promise – He will keep you in perfect peace
The condition – If you keep your mind STAYED on Him.
The reason - Because we trust Him

Don’t waste a single moment today worrying or fearing for tomorrow. Don’t let what only may be rob you of what is today.

Lord, help me today and everyday to keep my mind stayed on you and help me to trust you with everything I am.

Love,
Tracey

P.S. Turned out to be a complex cyst that they will biopsy. I’ll keep you posted – prayers appreciated!!

Alone TIme

2009-08-20T11:36:00.007-04:00

Yesterday God gave me an unexpected opportunity for some ALONE TIME and I grabbed it and ran!

In a spontaneous moment on Tuesday night at 9:30pm I decided to go with my husband to Orlando on Wednesday, to lounge around the pool at the Marriot World Center while he attended a Chick-fil-A seminar. We had to drive up to Tallahassee on Wednesday night for Zac's orientation so Danny would have had to drive back to New Port Richey just to have to get back in the car and drive up to Tallahassee the same night. So I, self-sacrificing wife that I am, offered to go to Orlando with him so that we could leave from there for Tallahassee. The decision set in motion a flurry of arrangements that had to be made.

I had to figure out where my daughter would stay, who would walk the dog and water the plants. We have house-guests arriving on Friday about the same time we will be getting home so I needed to do a quick cleanup of the upstairs and the bathrooms, throw a load of towels in the wash and I still needed to pack. It seemed like an awful lot to do to get ready to go on such short notice but all the while in the back of my mind was the payoff...ALONE TIME.

The past month has been very busy. I have caught myself several times saying to either my husband or friends, "I feel like I'm so busy I don't have time to think". I have been on the go and was craving a little rest.

Rest and time to think. I sometimes feel guilty even saying that I need those things. They sounds like luxuries for most of us that run at a normal pace of 100 miles an hour but they are not luxuries. They are necessary.

After a particularly busy series of events Jesus himself instructed his disciples to rest. They had been running at a crazy pace. Mark 6:30-31 tells us they didn't even have time to eat. (I always manage to make time to eat!!) Here's what the passage says:

And the apostles gathered together with Jesus; and they reported to Him all that they had done and taught. And He said to them, "Come away, by yourselves to a lonely place and rest a while." (For many people had been coming and going, and they did not even have time to eat.)

It is in that time alone that we have time to think. Ideas and dreams take shape when we take time to reflect. It is also in those "alone times" that God has the opportunity to speak to us. It doesn't have to be a huge amount of time either.

Maybe someone reading this is saying to themselves...I need some rest and some time to think. Sometimes we actually need to schedule that time in and sometimes we just need to grab it when we can.

Either way I pray that if you need that alone time that you will get it!

It did wonders for me yesterday :)

How it all began...

2008-06-12T13:14:00.009-04:00

To truly chronicle the beginnings of For the Girls International I would need to write a book but below you will find a synopsis of the events of my personal journey this year only.

When 2008 began I knew that this was the year. I just felt it in the core of my being. I didn’t know how or exactly when but I knew that I must start moving on this vision that has been in my heart for several years now. I made a commitment to myself and God that I would start moving forward even if it was the smallest of steps. That was January 1st 2008.

Fourteen days later at 2 o’clock in the morning I received a phone call that would change my life and the landscape of my extended family forever. My beautiful, adorable, bubbly, carefree and fearless cousin, Alex, died that night in a car accident. She was only eighteen. It is really impossible to describe how that news impacted me. It felt so final even though I knew that she was immediately with Jesus and that I would see her again. I felt so helpless. Shock and grief is so difficult to put into words. There is an overwhelming feeling of wanting to turn back the hands of time and do something to prevent it. How can you describe the emptiness and hopelessness you feel when you lose someone you love so dearly? There are no words.

In the months that have followed it has became evident to me that time is short. That NOW is when you have to step out and follow the dreams that God has placed in your heart. No one knows the day or the hour that God will call us to be with Him, and so we must live fully engaged in today, fulfilling our calling and purpose here on earth. I knew that I couldn’t wait much longer to begin this new journey called For the Girls International.

A month later, in February, while I was slowly emerging from the initial deep grief from Alex’s sudden death, I attended a conference for my husband’s business, Chick-fil-A. It’s a seminar for the Operators and their spouses to get refreshed and inspired for the coming year. It is always personally inspiring as well. Chick-fil-A is a company founded by committed Christians that live to inspire people on every level. As I sat through the sessions, I felt the fire of the vision of this ministry burning strong. On the second evening of the seminar I was having trouble sleeping. I felt compelled to write out my vision in the notebook given to us at the beginning of the week. At the top of the page I wrote... PERSONAL GOAL… and then wrote out, not very eloquently either, what was in my heart. I made it a goal to get started this year. I never intended for anyone to read it. It was for me and God - a little note to God.

The next day my husband and I went to the sessions and events, but that evening when we got back to our room I realized that at some point during the day I had lost my book. I was really bummed out and my husband didn’t understand why because he thought it was just full of notes I had taken, so I told him that I had written out my vision in it. Just as a side note… I am, and this can be confirmed by anyone who knows me well, on the spacey side of life. I lose my keys several times a week. I lock myself out of my car on a regular basis. I leave things everywhere (including my children). So this was not really out of the ordinary for me. My husband just rolled his eyes when I told him I couldn’t find my book.

The next morning as we rushed from breakfast to the general session, I checked with the lost and found desk that Chick-fil-A had set up and found several notebooks there (so I wasn’t the only airhead!) I flipped through them and found mine. I was so glad to have it back, but we were in a rush, so I just grabbed it and ran. When we settled into our seats I wanted to read my vision again so I flipped through to get to the page I had written it on. When I came to the page, I was completely taken back. There was someone else’s handwriting on the opposite page! Someone had written in my book!

Here’s what she wrote…
I found your book and was looking for a name when I saw this (arrow pointing to vision).
I’d love to help you with this.
Lysa TerKeurst and her cell phone #
Proverbs 31 Ministries proverbs31.org

I was completely freaked out! It was like God had written me a personal note to tell me that He loves me, He got my note, He knows the desires of my heart and that He was going to help make it happen. My heart was racing, my hands started to shake, and I couldn’t hear anything else that was going on in the room! I honestly just stared at it in disbelief for quite a while. What are the chances that out of 1500 women at that conference and hundreds of bathroom stalls that Lysa would follow me into the stall where I had left my book? Then, on top of that, what are the chances that she would open to the very page that I had written my vision on and read it?? Being the space cadet that I am, the chances of me losing something while I was at the conference were great, but all the rest of the “coincidences” completely defied all the odds.

Now, I had heard of Proverbs 31 Ministries because they do radio spots on my local Christian radio station but I didn’t think in my wildest dreams that it was the same ministry that was on my radio. I was excited just at the idea that someone already involved in women’s ministry would be offering to help me. For me the big thing was the acknowledgment from God and the fact that I could also get help and direction was completely over the top. After the conference ended and I got home, I looked up Proverbs 31 and was completely blown away by the magnitude of the ministry. It is a wonderful organization and the President of the ministry wants to help me!!!! I got in touch with Lysa who was a great help and encouragement and she suggested that I attend the She Speaks conference in June. I figured that would be the start of things for FTGI but God had other plans. On the same day that Lysa found my book, my friend Cynda (co-founder of FTGI) was receiving confirmation of her own through a phone call and before we knew it, we were set up for our first ministry trip to NYC.

One of my former pastors once said that oftentimes God takes a long time to move suddenly. That has certainly been the case for me.

As long as this first post is (and I promise they won’t all be this long), this is only one of many, many ways that God has confirmed over and over that He wants to do something great in the lives of women in this day and age. I am thrilled and humbled at the thought of being a part of that and can’t wait for what lies ahead.

Next step is She Speaks in NC next weekend!

Lots of Love,

Tracey

You can check out the blogspot for FTGI at http://www.forthegirlsinternational.blogspot.com/